So, its February 3rd and I am still milling around ideas of what I want 2012 to be for me. But, I think I have finally decided.It is not a specific list of goals and accomplishments, but rather one word keeps coming to mind when I think what I would like to be and to grow into in the year 2012.
F – O – C – U – S – E – D .
Let me explain a bit.
Life is – well, crazy. Its busy for everyone and I truly believe that Satan works on us by keeping us busy, even busy with lots of good things can be just busy enough to keep us from the BETTER stuff. My goal, my hope, for 2012 is that I can tune out the noise and busy-ness of my day to day, to not be so wrapped up in it all and to focus in on those people who reside within the walls of my own home.
This does not mean I will ignore friends, but it means I am becoming more and more aware of the shortness of time that I have with my 3 children. Granted there are still 10 years before Isabella turns 18, but, if they go anything like the past 8 well, then that’ll seem like next month. When my children look back on their childhood and life in our home I want them to say that their mom was focused on them, fought for them, taught them, encouraged them, loved them, and perhaps most importantly was always there for them. I hope that they will know that they were important to me because of my actions.
Not to be over shadowed by the children is Anthony. When we had Isabella we made a decision to always remember that our relationship began before we had children. All in all we have done well at remembering this and seeing our relationship in that way. However, in the busy-ness of life and motherhood its easy to collapse the moment the kids are in bed and tune out from everything. This year I want to remember to not allow the other roles in my life to over shadow that of wife, and to focus my attention on him, and on us.
So there you have it – 2012 is the year I focus on the 4 people who mean the most to me and be certain that nothing I do outside of them makes them feel unimportant or left behind. I imagine it like a photograph (surprise, surprise) – imagine a portrait with my little family of 5 front and center totally in crisp focus, but all around and behind us are our extended family, friends, responsibilities – everything that is good and important in our life but it is just a bit out of focus suggesting that for me the our 5 is the most significant thing in the portrait.
Now, I wrote all the above on Friday evening, but never posted it. Then this morning (Saturday) I went on pinterest and saw this:
It is exactly what I have been thinking, feeling, and what I was trying to express last night. It is my motto for 2012. Focused.